Diary of a Network Geek

More specifically, five questions to ask a date.

It's funny, I suppose, for me to think about these things so much just now, as I've really decided it's easier, better, for me not to date for a while. But, I suppose it's natural that as soon as I try to force such things from my thoughts, that's all that bubbles up.

Well, for those of you navigating those treacherous waters of long term relations, perhaps these five questions will provide you waypoints by which you may find your way.
Good luck.

Yes, it's true the higher cost of sending things overseas makes our economy stronger.

Well, in what I have to admit is a nice turn of events, ABC has an article telling us how the high oil prices are actually generating manufacturing jobs here, at home, in the good, old United States of America. Yea! So, what I've been saying for quite some time is finally being recognized by industry at large: it's cheaper to "outsource" to small towns in Middle America than it is to send the work overseas. Okay, maybe it wasn't quite as true when I was saying it back in 2003, but it sure seems to be now.

You know, it's not that I mind being right, even when I'm right so far ahead of the curve, but I sure wish people in positions of power would start listening to guys who have been in the trenches. Most of us really do know more than you'd expect about this stuff. Honest.

Okay, look, I normally only post one fun/funny thing a week, and usually on Friday, but this was just too good...

So, my regular readers will all know about my obsession with the Nerf Vulcan, a fully automatic belt-fed machine gun, and you new readers may have just been clued in. Now, I still don't have a release date on this bad-boy yet, but, I do have a link to video.
Yes, thanks to Gizmodo, I bring you a link to the Great NERF Office War video, featuring the Nerf Vulcan EBF-25!

Good times!

Okay, now, remember, this is silly.

Not to be taken seriously. At least, not very seriously.
Brought to you via MSN, How to be the Perfect Girlfriend and How to be the Perfect Boyfriend.

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So, good luck with that.

Too many people read my blog.

Too many people I know, too many people I care about, too many people who care about me.  In the early days of this blog, eight years ago, all I wanted was readers.  Now, all I worry about is who's reading.  Since I started this blog, we've added "Dooced" to our vocabulary.  We live in a world where potential dates Google each other to see what's on their Facebook or MySpace pages.  And, now, I'm much more careful about what I write.  I'm afraid to rant about the English gits, er, fine gentlemen from the UK, that I work with, in case they happen to be reading.  I don't say everything that I might otherwise about women I've dated, or even my ex-wife.
So, poor me, right?  So many people read my blog that I'm worried about how I'll come across, who I might offend.  I fret over little things like not getting to far away from who I am, or who I think people perceive me to be, lest I overly disturb their sense of how I fit with them and the world.  Yeah, what a terrible burden I bear.  Ha.

So, I've talked about starting another blog, a creative blog, that's not so closely associated with my professional life, with me.  Something where I can experiment on the screen and go mental and emotional and creative places that I feel too stifled to go here.  The Super Secret Creative Project of Doom.  It keeps me awake at nights, like tonight, and gnaws at me like the Midgard Serpent gnaws at the roots of the Tree of Life.  And, even as I write things like that, I feel the teenage angst that's been sent off to French boarding school and grown up into upper middle-class ennui, like I should be wearing a black beret and smoking clove cigarettes.
So, where's the drug that's supposed to help me?  The clove cigarettes don't take the edge off any more and the single-malt Scotch doesn't help me sleep.  So, what's a guy to do at 1:00 A.M. when my mind is racing, but the track is a tight circle that's getting ever smaller and muddier?

What's there to do but blog?

I watched No Maps For These Territories this weekend.
I'm not a huge fan of documentaries, even though I like shows in the Discovery Channel and National Geographic Channel.  But, I've been really getting into my Netflix subscription lately and, as a result, I've been renting DVDs that I might not otherwise get.  So, since William Gibson is one of my favorite authors, I thought a good "stretch" for me to take was getting a documentary on, and starring, William Gibson.  In general, it was okay.  It's certainly not something I'd be interested in if it were some other author, but, somehow, hearing and seeing Gibson talk about his work and the future and writing in the back of a moving car was an oddly engaging format.  I think, in particular, hearing his voice talking much like he writes was appealing, at least to me.

Of course, it's not something that would interest anyone who wasn't a Gibson fan.  It's not the kind of thing that someone who's interested in simply science-fiction or writing, for instance, would find all that appealing.  I think, too, that Gibson himself is an acquired taste.  Even people who have enjoyed his writing may not be particularly captivated by this documentary.  The "arty" portion of the film was somewhat, well, annoying, to be honest.  When the film-maker was being subtle, by altering the view outside the car's windows, it was good.  However, when the effort was more obvious, it was just distracting and irritating.  I don't know quite what he was going for with some of that video stream-of-consciousness but it failed at being anything but confusing and silly.  A straight interview with Gibson talking to us from the back of the car would have been better, I think.  He is, after all, the draw for this film.

Some of the extras were nice, though.  For instance, some of the things that were cut out and compiled with the DVD were as interesting as anything that were included.  In fact, I think I would have just left them in the main part of the film.  There were also several readings, by Gibson and others, which had no video with them, that were nice, too.  I just closed my eyes and listened to Gibson read his own writing, feeling the pace and timber of his voice.  Really, that may have been the best part of the whole thing.
I could have done without most of the film-maker talking about making the documentary itself, though.  There was only one section worth including and that was really about the interaction between the crew and Gibson as they filmed in the car.  The rest of the segments where the documentarian talking about his "process" are, to me, worthless crap.

In all, it was an interesting departure for me.  Worth a look for the hard-core William Gibson fan, but not really for anyone else.

IncredibleHulk

Originally uploaded by Network Geek

Yes, I saw The Incredible Hulk Friday night.

But, I swear, I am not a hardcore movie or comic book geek. It was just coincidence that my buddy and I went to see this on opening night. Honest.
In a nutshell, The Incredible Hulk was a good movie. Not as good as Iron Man but way, way better than the last Hulk movie directed by Ang Lee. He may be a great director, but he just doesn't understand American comic books. This movie, however, was better than average. And, from here on out, the spoilers are rampant, so if that bothers you, stop reading.

The movie starts with Bruce Banner in the slums of Brazil, hiding from both his green alter-ego and General "Thunderbolt" Ross and the U.S. military. He's shown working with a martial artist learning both self-defense and how to control his emotions in an attempt to rein in the chaotic Hulk. (Incidentally, the martial arts instructor is "played" by Rickson Gracie, a world famous jiu-jitsu fighter and instructor.) Then, during the opening credits, they pay homage to the Incredible Hulk TV show, by showing a different version of the Hulk's origin which, amazingly enough, blends both the old movie and the new version together quite well. The opening credits also have design documents from Stark Industries, referencing the Iron Man movie and highlighting Marvel's brilliant strategy of crossing their movies over a bit for some built-in self marketing.
Of course, it doesn't take long before Banner, played quite well by Edward Norton, runs into problems both with some local toughs and General Ross' team of commandos. The end result? Here comes the Hulk, naturally. Well, Banner "Hulks out" and ends up several countries away in Guatemala, when he wakes up from his Hulk induced blackout. Naturally, he decides to keep heading North through Mexico to get back into the US where he hopes to retrieve the data from his old experiment that made him the Hulk to aid him in his quest for a cure. Naturally, this brings him back in contact with his old flame, Elizabeth Ross, played by Liv Tyler. Frankly, I don't care for her as anything but an elf or a video vixen in her daddy's videos. She is easily the weakest part of this movie. Well, as you might have guessed, old Thunderbolt Ross is there, watching and waiting for Banner. This time, though, he's got more than just commandos to help him capture the good doctor. He's got a full array armament, including a pair of sonic cannons that are fairly cool. Oh, and he's given his pet commando, Emil Blonsky, played by Tim Roth, a super-soldier serum to make him, well, super.
Of course, Banner Hulks out again, and gets away, but this time he takes Betty Ross with him on the run. They try to find the scientist who's been helping Banner find a cure, armed with the data for which Banner has risked all this trouble.

Well, I won't tell you all the secrets in this movie, in case you plan on seeing it, but, I do have a couple more cool things to look out for. First, let me remind you of the Stark Industries reference to last month's Iron Man movie. Also, there's a cameo by Robert Downy Jr., aka Tony Stark, during a bar scene that also ties into Iron Man and the upcoming Avenger's movie.
Naturally, there's also a cameo by Stan Lee, Hulk creator and comic book legend. He plays a regular guy who drinks some tainted South American soda and, unfortunately, expires from gamma radiation poisoning. But, as always, his cameo is fun and funny.
Also, there are numerous tie-ins to the rest of the Marvel universe, which is very cool. In fact, there are many setups for a second Hulk film as well as the other references to recent and upcoming Marvel films that I've already mentioned.
I was disappointed that they edited out the Captain America cameo. Not sure where it was supposed to be, but it seems like a number of things that we were shown in early trailers and previews got trimmed or cut completely. Oh, well, at least it didn't take anything away from the movie.
Oh, and don't forget to look for a cameo by Lou Ferrigno, who played the original TV Hulk, as a security guard.

One small criticism, though, is the CG. You'd think it'd be the last thing I'd complain about, right? I mean, I'm total CG fan, sure, and the more realistic it is, the better I like it, but they almost go too far on the Hulk. He's a little more than "real", I think. I don't know how much time they spent on it, but I think they spent a little too much time. Sometimes, less is more and I think this is one of those times. Or, at least, the should have spread the CG budget around a bit and used the effects on something other than the Hulk. I definitely think that the CG in Iron Man was better but, honestly, it's only a minor thing.

So, in short, to sum up, The Incredible Hulk was good. Not as good as Iron Man, but better than Ang Lee's version. Well worth seeing, especially if you're a comic book fan.
Now, go see it!

On this day in 1951, my profession was, essentially "born".

Today marks the anniversary of the unveiling of the UNIVAC, the world's first commercially produced and available electronic digital computer in the United States. The first electronic computers were invented during World War II by the military. Engineers in Great Britain invented the Colossus computer to help break Nazi codes, and engineers in the United States invented the ENIAC, to help calculate the trajectories of missiles.
The ENIAC used 17,468 vacuum tubes, 7,200 crystal diodes, 1,500 relays, 70,000 resistors, 10,000 capacitors and around 5 million hand-soldered joints. It weighed 30 tons, was roughly 8 feet by 3 feet by 100 feet, took up 1800 square feet, and consumed 150 kW of power. The ENIAC radiated so much heat that industrial cooling fans were needed to keep its circuitry from melting down. It took two days to reprogram it for each new task.

The men who created the ENIAC decided to go into private business for themselves, and it was on this day in 1951 that they unveiled their first product, the UNIVAC I, the world's first commercially available electronic computer. It was quite an improvement over the ENIAC, using a mere5,200 vacuum tubes, UNIVAC I weighed just 29,000 pounds (or 13 tons), consumed 125 kW, and could perform about 1,905 operations per second running on a 2.25 MHz clock, which was the fastest calculation rate in the world at the time. The Central Complex alone (i.e. the processor and memory unit) was 14 feet by 8 feet by 8.5 feet high. The complete system occupied more than 350 square feet of floor space.
The first customer to buy the UNIVAC was the United States Census Bureau, and the computer was used to predict the presidential election of 1952, after early returns began to come in. It correctly predicted that Eisenhower would win. Originally priced at $159,000, the UNIVAC I rose in price until they were between $1,250,000 and $1,500,000. A total of 46 systems were eventually built and delivered.
Thomas J. Watson, the chairman of IBM at the time, thought that computers, with all their incredibly complex vacuum tubes and circuitry, were too complicated. He famously said, "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers." But with the invention of the microchip in 1971, all the processing power of those thousands of vacuum tubes and punch cards could suddenly be crammed into a space the size of a postage stamp. Within a decade, the first personal computers, or PCs, began to appear. Ironically, Apple made them popular and inexpensive enough for the home user and drove what we think of as the computer revolution.

But, it all started with UNIVAC. So, happy birthday, big guy. Thanks for being just delicate enough to keep me working!

When everyone else has bad luck, I have great luck.

No, seriously!  I can't wait to see how much my general luck improves compared to everyone else's today.  Personally, I think it's really all about keeping a positive mental attitude.  I mean, people are so quick to blame anything that goes wrong in their life on some superstitious belief that they're having "bad luck" caused by some uncontrollable, supernatural event that they never stop to ask why they might have had even worse luck!  And, frankly, I think most people who will blame Friday the Thirteenth for their rotten luck don't have any idea why they're doing so!

So, why not tell them?  No, seriously, go check out "How Friday the 13th Works" at HowStuffWorks.com or "Why Friday the 13th is Unlucky" at About.com to see some ideas about why people think this way.  Personally, as a Freemason and a bit of a Knights Templar buff, I've always gone with how that was the day the Knights Templar were suppressed in all of Europe.  It's as good as any other superstition!

My users think I'm a magician or a sorcerer.

Frankly, I'm not sure which is better.
In any case, this week I finally cleaned up the last remnants of some nastiness that one of my users got himself into. He followed a link from Google search results to what seemed like a perfectly legitimate blog. He was looking for some poetry reference in the Sex In The City movie. (Yeah, I know, I know. A big, tough oil industry service guy looking for poetry in a chick flick. Go figure!) Well, when he got to this blog, it had an embedded player with what it claimed was a clip from the movie. But, when he went to play the clip, it told him he needed to update his Flash player and provides a "helpful" link. That's when all manner of unholiness broke loose on his computer.

Well, he got updated, all right. With spyware and virii. I lost count of how many and what kind there were. One changed his time and date format to include the text "VIRUS ALERT!!", so that it appeared next to the time on his Taskbar. Another made his main hard drive, his "C" drive, disappear from his My Computer! And, at least one of these was the FakeAVAlert trojan, but I never did figure out which one scrambled his My Computer. The funny thing was, after running every anti-virus and spyware removal tool that I normally use, the drive was still hiding somewhere. But, he was running from that drive just fine! Well, I searched for a day or two, while doing the rest of my normal gig, but never could find why this had happened.
I did, however, find a fix. TweakUI from the Windows XP Power Toys. I loaded that on his computer then went in to it under the My Computer section and, sure enough, the local drive was shown as being hidden. I corrected that and **SHAZAM**!!
UPDATE: It occurred to me this morning, after posting, that I should let you all know how to fix the clock issue in more detail.  The setting is found in the Control Panel, under Regional Options, which is not quite intuitive.  Under Regional Options, choose Custom, then find Time and adjust the format per the screen instructions.  If you're in Windows 2000, once Regional Options is open, choose the Time tab and adjust accordingly.

Yep, just like magic, I am.