Diary of a Network Geek

...I am a level 15 Paladin!"

Actually, I never played paladins when I was a D&D freak. I played magic-users, illusionists, druids and thieves. I was better at thieves, but, since a friend really had a thing for thieves, and I could play a better magic-user than just about anyone else in our group, especially at low-levels, that was what I played most often. Where am I going with this? Wired has a sneak-preview of a character sheet from the latest version of Dungeons & Dragons, a Level 15 Paladin. Naturally!

While I'm not so sure about version FOUR of D&D (must not buy $150+ of game books! Argh!), the "I am not a geek..." t-shirt is available from Jinx, though I like the skeleton logo one better.

Okay, that's not what the article is called, but it might as well be.

Some time back, MSN ran an article called The Art of the Pickup, which was all about how to hit on someone in a coffee shop.  And, now you all have it, just in time for the weekend.

Happy hunting!

Life is about passion.

Tomorrow, there will be a post that links to an article about meeting someone in a coffee shop. No, I haven't met someone! Rather, it's an article about how to meet someone. I tend to associate that sort of thing with passion. The passion of need, of possession. Of two becoming one. But, I have to be honest, my idea of passion has always included more than that.

Okay, sure, you're thinking "Hey, a divorced, middle-aged, white guy who makes a living by being geekier than the average geek survives cancer and thinks he's suddenly qualified to ramble on about passion", right? Well, it's not that. I've been hurting for something to be passionate about since the sixth grade. Oh, I get obsessed with things, sure. Some small, obscure subject will fascinate me for a few weeks or months and I'll go through a cycle of knowing as much as I can about whatever it is before it bores me and it becomes something that gathers metaphorical dust in the attic of my mind, if I'm lucky. If I'm not lucky, it gathers actual dust on my coffee table. This is how I account for my owning both the complete, original John Byrne run of Alpha Flight, the collected Prisoner, the Dune Encyclopedia and Space: Above and Beyond. It's also how I learned Perl and Linux and wrote plugins for WordPress. That same cycle is how I learned about survival, security, self-defense, koi, philosophy, and just about anything else interesting that I know. But, none of it really lasts. It's just a flash of white-hot passion, then it's gone.

What I long for, what I've always longed for, is something that makes me feel passionate forever. And, yes, I thought I had that when I was married, but, well, it turned out that passion was misplaced. So, now I wonder if all of it was misplaced. If it was all a useless, empty quest to find passion that is impossible to grasp. Before I met my ex-wife, I felt that passion about my work, but, after losing a job that was my life, I discovered work was just a job. So, now, I'm left searching, seeking, hunting that elusive passion which seems so slippery.

So, in spite of what you'll read in this space tomorrow, I don't ever want to sink all that passion into a person, of either sex, again.  And, any thing or activity that I allow myself to be passionate about again will have to be something that can't be taken away from me.  Work comes and goes.
But writing...  Well, if I were to lose this blog, this laptop that I'm writing from, I could still write.  A cheap notebook and stub of a pencil stolen from Ikea is enough.  The words, the hammering out of the words, sentences, paragraphs, that takes no special tools, only, well, the passion.  So, too, God.  Even fewer tools to seek God.  I can find His presence anywhere, anytime.  Again, what matters is the passion for the spiritual connection, the seeking God's presence.  But, how?  What to write?  How to find God?  What step to take next?

Who knows?  I suppose I'll find out if I keep after it, that search for passion.  So, dear readers, what makes you light up with that passion for living?  What gets you out of bed in the morning?

FandSFMagJuly

Originally uploaded by Network Geek

I got a free review copy of Fantasy and Science Fiction Magazine last week.

F&SF Mag, as I will refer to them for the rest of this post, had a deal which I was lucky enough to get in on. They offered a free review copy of their July issue for bloggers who would be willing to review that issue and, well, blog about it. They kept up their end of the deal, so, now, I'm keeping up my end.

F&SF Mag is, in general, fabulous. The July issue will be no exception. Now, I haven't read all of it yet, but what I have read lives up to the already high standard that they have set for as long as I can remember.
In this issue, you'll find one novella, two novelets, three short stories and all their regular columns. The novella is The Roberts by Michael Blumlein. The novelets are Fullbrim's Finding by Matthew Hughes and Poison Victory by Albert E. Cowdrey. The three short stories are Reader's Guide by Lisa Goldstein, Enfant Terrible by Scott Dalrymple and The Dinosaur Train by James L. Cambias. Now, I haven't heard of any of these authors, but, frankly, that doesn't mean much as I've been reading a lot of non-fiction the past several years. Also, they may be short-form stars, but, honestly, there just aren't that many venues available to showcase fantasy and science fiction short work any more. It's one of the reasons I wanted to get this magazine and why I've bought it regularly in the past.

I read Reader's Guide by Lisa Goldstein, Enfant Terrible by Scott Dalrymple and The Dinosaur Train by James L. Cambias, but I plan to read the longer work, too, eventually.
Reader's Guide is a story about a kind of librarian in a special kind of library filled with potential books, as well as books that have already been written. The story follows the protagonist through a transformation to a new, deeper understanding of the library and the people who haunt it. But, to tell you more than that would, I think, ruin the story.
I also read Enfant Terrible by Scott Dalrymple. This story was about a very special little boy and his somewhat symbiotic relationship with another life. Again, to say more would ruin the story and, as this story is better than the last, I'd hate to diminish your pleasure in reading it.
The third, and best, story I read was The Dinosaur Train by James L. Cambias. I wouldn't be surprised if this author ends up being an award winner in the near future. The Dinosaur Train was about a family who own and operate a dinosaur circus. Sadly, the circus has seen better times and, what's worse, their main attraction, a huge sauropod, is sick. The plot is driven by both this, and the conflicts within the family. It is, as I already mentioned, the best story of the bunch. I look forward to reading more from this author. And, I must admit, I may have had a bit of deeper resonance with this story due to my own family's history in the circus business.

The short story, indeed, all short fiction, is a very different art than the epic-length novel. Sadly, it seems to be a dying art. There are fewer and fewer venues that we might find this form and, thankfully, Fantasy and Science Fiction Magazine shows that form in my favorite genre very well. I'm glad that they seem to still be doing so well. If it's been some time since you've looked at magazines with short fiction, I highly recommend getting the next issue of Fantasy and Science Fiction Magazine. It's worth every penny and then some!

Oh, and if you're interested in getting a subscription to Fantasy and Science Fiction Magazine, they have a special offer for bloggers who did a review. Just click this link!

I love OpenSource software.

I especially love it when it's free. I love free extensions for OpenSource software I use on a regular basis, too. Microsoft Office isn't the only game in town and people do develop for OpenOffice.

If you haven't yet, check them out.

Okay, so this is really a local news item, but I think it's still noteworthy.

It will come as no surprise to anyone who lives here that Houston has an ant problem. However, what may come as a surprise is just how bad it is and why. According to Wired and Yahoo! News, we're being over run with the "crazy strawberry ant", which is much worse than their cute name would imply. Now, the good news is that they kill fire ants, which are a plague of the worst order, but the bad news is these crazy strawberry ants love to foul electronics. Also, they're resistant to current chemicals that kill them and they have multiple queens in a single nest, making them doubly hard to kill.

Luckily, there is an adorable solution to the entire mess: the South American tamandua. I don't care if they cost $4500 or more. I want one!

Just trying to love the skin I'm in.

I hate being transparent. I especially hate it when my little character flaws show through so easily.
I was talking with someone about dropping weight the other day and he made a comment about how I seemed to have a self-esteem problem. If I recall, he phrased it as a question, which made the observation a bit more palatable. But, the truth is, I've never been all that comfortable in my own skin. I've always rather wanted to be someone else or to be doing something else. Perhaps that's why I've been drawn to writing and reading fiction, as it gives me the opportunity to be someone else, even for a short time.

Oh, I know, intellectually, that I'm not such a bad guy. A bit over-weight at the moment, but working on restoring a healthy lifestyle. Somewhat above average intelligence, but not so smart that I'm overly annoying. Far from movie-star handsome, but I don't make small children cry in horror. Mostly, I'm an average guy, who's pretty much a self-made man. Really, most of the things about myself that I'm truly proud of are things that I did or earned through plain, old hard work. Yeah, sure, I have a college degree, which actually makes me above average in many respects, but I taught myself most of what I know in my chosen career. Even my writing, when I was really good, was a mostly self-taught skill, honed through hard work and practice. So, I suppose that it's not surprising that I'm proud of my ability to lose weight and re-sculpt my body into something less soft and weak. Really, this will be at least the third time I've done that.

But, it's true that my efforts in the area of diet and exercise are driven by an essential distaste for my own physical self. I want someone else's skin. At the very least, I want to carve my own skin into something, someone, else.
It may be that single fact is what holds me back from a deeper spiritual life. I think when I do truly learn to love the skin I'm in, only then, will I find peace and through that inner peace, God. And my struggle, is to not struggle with that, but to let the process unfold as it will, as it needs to unfold. To let go, and let God.
By the way, I lost another two and a fraction pounds as of my weekly weigh-in on Sunday.

Wow, talk about the School of Hard Knocks!

Apparently, there's a trend in MBA programs to use ex-cons as speakers to educate the MBA hopefuls on ethics and legal behavior. Now, I can see how it would get the point across, and I'm all for letting someone who's paid their debt to society make a living, but is this really the best idea? I mean, shouldn't we teach ethics and proper, legal business behavior through positive examples not negative ones? As the article suggests some people think, it's almost like rewarding criminal behavior.

I did like, however, the mention of the ex-con who embezzled million dollars from the security company who hired him. He's awaiting sentencing now. I think they should sentence him to life, in a cubicle.

Well, more precisely, extending your wifi signal.

Not too long ago, I bought an antenna for my wifi router, in an attempt to broaden the range of my laptop in my own house. I could barely get a signal in my bedroom. Outside, on the back porch, I could only get a signal if I sat with my back to the yard! Well, unfortunately, before I could even test the antenna, my router fried and I had to get a new one. Luckily, the new LinkSys wifi router had better signal coverage, so I didn't need the extra help.
But, if you still do, or just want to get a little bit more out of your wireless router, this article on ZDNet titled Expert tips on extending your home WiFi range has some good suggestions.

I have a dream.

I want to make money, without selling, day and night.
Basically, I dream of what everyone who's ever done any freelance programming or creative work of any kind dreams of doing. I want to have a product, or automated service, that people pay for and that I don't have to keep after all the time. Originally, I thought I might manage that with a couple of really killer books, but, at the rate I'm going, that's a long way off, at best. Then, I thought I'd found it with the plugins I'd written for WordPress, but, alas, it was not to be. It still might happen with some really good themes for WordPress, but, honestly, I doubt it.
But, if you dream of that, too, then check out Creating Passive Income for Freelancers over at FreelanceSwitch. And, for a larger, less specific look, see The Global Microbrand.
This is my dream.