Diary of a Network Geek

Yes, I read books without pictures. Sometimes.
Frankly, I do prefer the books with pictures. Preferably big pictures in color that illustrate the more complicated points in the text. But, I digress... Recently, I finished reading Fluke: Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings and you can read that review at The Fantasist's Scroll. And, today at lunch I started reading Airtight Willie & Me, which is a little different. It's what be called "ethnic fiction", if you're being polite, or "ghetto writing", if you're being accurate. I've read about the first 45 pages or so and it's surprisingly good. Of course, it's a little gritty and filled with slang and poor grammar, but it's no worse than reading the web these days. Oh, and the author is from Chicago, so there's a lot of "local interest" in it for me. Though, I have to admit, Iceberg Slim's Chicago is a whole lot different than mine!
So, there's an upside to all this time alone after all. I get a lot more reading done these days with a whole lot less hassle. And, no one gives me hell about what I'm reading!

Good question.
First of all, I'm talking about work, not my personal life. So, no, you may not speculate on what kind of degenerate, misogynistic, low-life I am. Besides, there are already plenty of bottom-feeders who are doing that. No, now that I'm a on-man IT department again, I wear a lot of hats.
Last week, I was a data security officer, a helpdesk, a Microsoft Excel Developer, a graphics designer, a server administrator and a web master. This week, so far, I have been a helpdesk, a Macintosh administrator, a server administrator and a web master. But, it's only Tuesday.

Oh, I also had a rather uncomfortable teleconference hearing with the Texas Workforce Commision regarding my requested benefits. Still waiting to see if I'm going to get that one week of unemployment or not. Good thing I didn't need it, eh? But, I have to say, the entire hearing process was, well, really, er, "icky". No matter what some people may have said about me in the past, I really don't like confrontational situations like that. I can handle them, and handle them well, I might add, but I don't really like them. Just something that I have to do from time to time. One of the many things I don't like that I have managed to do well at anyway. Of course, I'll have to wait and see how well I really did this morning, but I think it went well.

Father, I belong to you. I place myself anew in your hands and acknowledge you as Master and Lord of my life. Grant me the gift of a forgiving heart and cleanse me of any anger, hostility, or revenge. Heal my hurts and teach me to rely on your love. Grant me wisdom of heart and strengthen me by your grace to move on in faith, in trust, and in love. Thank you, Lord, for your love in my life.

source: Catholic Doors Ministry

So many things I could add to that today, but I don't think any of them would make sense. If you know anyone who's hurting because of their relationship choices, please, pass this on to them. And, pray for them.

Yes, it's true!
Today is National Donut Day, at least at Krispy Kreme. Today, to celebrate National Donut Day, which was established in 1938 by the Chicago Salvation Army to raise much-needed funds during the Great Depression and to honor the work of World War I Salvation Army volunteers who prepared doughnuts for thousands of soldiers, Krispy Kreme is giving out one free donut to their customers. I assume you have to buy something to get the free donut, but, still, a free donut is a free donut! Sounds too good to be true? Read the Krispy Kreme Press release.

Happy Friday! And, enjoy your free donut!

Oh, how I could have used this at other jobs...
Okay, now, I haven't been writing about it, but I've been wrestling with worms. No, not earth worms, or heart worms or even tape worms. Windows Worms. Well, I guess they're actually "e-mail worms", but I've never heard of one that occurs on any other operating system other than Windows. Unless, of course, you count the infamous Internet, or Morris, Worm. In any case, since most of my workstations are Windows-based, I have worms. Not as many as I did, but it's still something that keeps me awake at night.
So, imagine my joy when I finally found the Symantec Security Response Worm Removal Tool page.
Go forth and infect no more.

Not quite universal, but close.
Ever worry about your cell phone getting stolen? Well, if you have the serial number from it, you can get it turned off quickly and easily and keep the crooks from reenabling it. Here's what to do:
First, entering the sequence * # 0 6 # on your cell phone's keypad will produce a display showing a fifteen-digit code or serial number unique to your phone. Write that down somewhere safe.
Now, keep in mind that this doesn't work with every phone, but, surprisingly, to me at least, it does work with most of them. Go ahead and try it yourself.
Now, shhould your cell phone be stolen, you can report its serial number to your service provider and have the phone disabled. This will prevent the thief from using your phone with a different wireless number or a different service.
Pretty cool right? Guess where I read about this... Snopes.com, the urban legend website. Interestingly enough, this "urban legend" turns out to be true. Who'd a thunk it?

Don't laugh, it happens sometimes!
Lately, I've had a lot of externally generated chaos in my life. People doing things that they can morally justify in their own, strange view of the world. Imagined "crimes" I've committed against them making their own bad behavior somehow "justice". It's an interesting thought, really. But, I'm reminded of a quote:

"Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo."
-H.G. Wells

Interesting that a science-fiction author would come up with that one, isn't it?
So, I find myself looking at my own behavior in light of that statement. What am I jealous of? What makes me angry and cry out for justice? Frankly, nothing that I should expect justice from as the end result. Why should I expect justice? Am I somehow so morally upright, or worse, superior, that I should expect justice when others recieve none?

"Who told you life was fair?"
-William F. Hoffman, Jr. (my father)

Funny, that now, Dad should tell me that I'm about due for something good to happen to me. And, that I should be the one to remind him that, just because I'm "due" doesn't mean that it will happen. Hey, sometimes, life just isn't "fair". I don't get my way. Sometimes, I lose. Things and people are taken away from me. I'm punished for things other people did. But, none of that is an excuse for me to behave badly.

"There is no merit in discipline under ideal circumstances. I'll have it in the face of death, or it's useless."
-Issac Asimov

In the end, it is my moral duty to behave in a manner consistent with my personal belief system, no matter the circumstances. It is often painful and fills my life with uncomfortable situations, but that is no excuse. I cannot change my moral compass because I hit rough seas. A new compass will still point the way and if it doesn't, then I'm lost.

"Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him:
but I will maintain mine own ways before him."
-Job 13:15

I've often identified with poor, old Job. The guy got pounded at God's acquiesence. The Enemy, which is how Satan translates from Hebrew, was given the opportunity to turn Job from God. He hit Job with everything under the Sun, but he never denounced God. Oh, just like me, he shook his fist at God and asked "Why me?!", but he never renounced his belief. God abides, whether I choose to believe in His power or not. I only cheat myself to deny him. He sustains me through the hard times when all humans may desert me. Prayer realigns me to His presence and His purpose for me.

" From one thing, know ten thousand things. "
-Miyamoto Musashi, The Book of Five Rings

So, from each "problem" I try to learn something new. About myself, about the world, or about God and His path for me. It's not always easy and I often need help to see the lesson. That's one of the reasons I'm looking forward to my health insurance kicking back in so I can get back to seeing my therapist. We'd just gotten to a point where I was starting to learn some really interesting things about myself and then... Pop! Ah, well, from what I understand, those deep, dark secrets will still be there when I get back to seeing him. I never thought I'd feel so good about going to a therapist. Really. Of course, part of that is I'm learning how tough I am on myself. For years, I held myself to a higher standard than those around me, much to my own detriment. So, for me, learning to be gentle with myself and "ease up" on myself has been a challenge.

"We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove-lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again - and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore."
-Mark Twain

I try to keep that in mind as I learn to trust again. And, as I learn to be more honest, with myself and others. Honesty works both ways. First, I have to stop lying to myself, then I have to keep from lying to others. Not everyone is up to the task, and I know I wasn't always either. But, the truth is easier than keeping track of so many lies. Much easier.

"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free."
-John 8:32

One of my heroes from early on was Abraham Lincoln.
He overcame enourmas difficulties to achieve his life goals and bring a country divided by war together again. One of my favorite quotes from him is:

In times like the present, men should utter nothing for which they would not willingly be responsible through time and eternity.

It is my guiding principle these days. But, sadly, it has not always been so. It should be, though. Is there ever a time when I should act as if there will be no consequences? No, I don't think so. Unfortunately, it took me many years and much loss to discover that to be true. It's a shame that I realized that so late and was never able to help anyone else important to me learn that, either.
Well, there's always hope for them, and, of course, the future.

No, kidding! Who would've guessed?
Apparently, paranoid conspiracy-theorist type people seem to find that the Internet confirms their most paranoid fears. At least, according to this article on MindHacks, which references an article on Psychopathology, which is a professional Psychology journal, and was brought to you via Boing Boing. Apparently, now, instead of hearing J. Edgar Hoover transmitting via their fillings, the Internet and search engines now "reveal" to people suffering from paranoid dellusions just who and what is after them. It's not clear if the "why" is revealed to them or not, but, I'm guessing that part comes before the obsessive viewing of the Internet. As I'm not paranoid, though, I can't be sure.

Anyway, it's Friday and the boss isn't looking, trust me, so it's safe to click the link.
(Am I paranoid if they really do end up being out to get me?)

I wasn't going to write an entry this evening.
But, then my dog went and was cute. You see, I just got back from walking her, even though I'd decided not to do that this evening. It's been hot and it looked like rain and, well, frankly, I was just tired tonight. In fact, I decided last night that it was too hot and opted out of our usual walk. But, tonight, Hilda just wouldn't let me alone until I got up off my tired butt and took her for her walk.
First, she just paced around and whined a little. I ignored her, figuring that she wanted to chase a squirrel in the backyard. Then, she kept coming up and licking my elbow. I checked her food and water. She had both. Finally, she put her head in my lap, looked up at me and sighed through her nose. So, I asked her if she wanted to go out and she danced around by the back door until I got up and then she sat down, quivering when I got close. That was when I figured she wanted her W-A-L-K. When I asked her if that's what she wanted, she practically squealed with delight that her stupid human had finally figured it out.
So, we went for our drag, er, walk. And, sure enough, when we got home, she was all calm and quiet. She just knew it was Thursday and time for her walk. Heck, she probably had figured out that I'd cheated her yesterday and wasn't going to let me get away with it again! Those darn kids! Er, Dogs! She's smart as a whip, that Hilda of mine.

You know, a walk is the least I can do for her. She's always so happy to see me. It doesn't matter if I've been away five minutes or five hours or five days. Her level of joy is constant. The only thing that troubles her is an empty food bowl and a squirrel on the patio. And, apparently, getting her walks! I wish I could set aside all my cares and be as openly, unabashedly joyful as my dog. So simple that it seems to almost be a spiritual lesson. Simple joy. Even if she's "just" a dog, that measure of simple joy I get from her heals me a little bit every time I see it.
Yep, I envy my puppy her joy. But, as long as she shares it with me, I don't mind.