I “failed” at NaNoWriMo, again.
I think November is quite possibly the absolute worst month for me to dedicate myself to a writing project. I end up with more social and work obligations in November than any other month of the year. At least, that’s how it’s seemed to me for the past several years. Hell, three years ago, when I planned to do NaNoWriMo for the first time, I was lucky to drag myself through the month at all! Last year, I was coughing blood and converting a phone system. This year I just had so many social obligations that I just got behind and never caught up.
And, I have to admit, I also didn’t plan things nearly enough. Last year, at least I had worked out a bit of research and I’d been writing a bit. This year, not only did I not do enough research, but I don’t think I’d written a word of fiction all year! Seriously, it’s kind of been a long year with a lot of physical demands on me, so I just haven’t been writing creatively, outside this blog, at all. I think it was pretty unrealistic of me to just jump in cold like that and expect to be writing over 1,500 words each day. In any case, I think what it proves to me is that I need to keep writing all the time. Waiting to get inspired is just foolish, as has been proven over and over by professional writers. Rather, if I keep writing, the inspiration will come of its own accord. So, that is my goal for the coming year: to write, every week.
To console myself, however, I bought my camera yesterday.
Ritz/Wolf Camera had a sale, which ended yesterday, that got me a Canon EOS Digital Rebel XTi with an 18-55mm lens and a 75-300mm zoom lens for just under $800 before tax. I added a 2gig memory card and the two-year protection and maintenance plan as well. The maintenance plan seemed a little expensive, at first, until one considers that it will repair or replace the camera and either lens, no matter the damage, for two years. And, it included an annual cleaning, each of which were almost half the price of the plan. Well worth it, I think, considering the investment I made. Oh, and the package deal specified a regular 55mm lens, but they were out of that, so I got a free upgrade to an 18-55mm lens with image stabilization built in. Super cool!
To be honest, I felt a little guilty about buying the camera.
I mean, sure, I did “earn” the money via ad revenue and I have wanted a really good digital camera for a while now, but, well… Well, the guilty, co-dependant in me feels like I shouldn’t spend money on myself. Rather, I should be spending that money on some charity or other. Giving it to the church or feeding starving children in Africa or something. Naturally, I called a friend to churn this over in my head and his response did help put things in perspective for me.
“Look, you just survived cancer this year…” And, that was as far as he got before I had already gotten the point. Yes, it has been a rougher than usual year and I have really wanted a good camera with which I can make art for some time. But, I do want to avoid that whole feeling of entitlement. I don’t ever want to get back into a mindset of “I deserve this because things have been rough lately.” In the past, that kind of attitude has not served me well. Not at all.
So, I’ll try to avoid that feeling and still make use of and enjoy the camera.
I do deserve good things and I do deserve to have fun, cancer not with standing. I do work hard for most everything I have and I am grateful for the opportunities that God gives me, both to get good things and to give good things. And, I do appreciate every, single person who has ever clicked on an ad on my website that earned me the money to buy this. It has made me think more and pay more attention to advertising on other people’s websites, if nothing else.
And, of course, you all will get to see more photos as time goes by and I get better with my new toy. I know at least one unusual feature of Houston that I want to capture, though it may take some time. Oh, in case you hadn’t figured it out, all the pictures in this post were taken with the new camera.
Tomorrow, I’ll lay out the camera itself and take pictures of it, per a challenge from Peter, the Brit. Until then, though, enjoy these!